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Vanessa 
 
When I sing my mind becomes 
a cool blue ocean
  
 
When I hug my dog I sink into 
his thick brown fur
  
 
When the children run to me 
I open like the morning
  
 
I can not save my brother 
I can not save my sister
  
 
I can not make my fingers strum 
this stubborn mean guitar
  
 
Come into my house now 
sit here right beside me
  
 
tell me why you love me 
and I will sing for you.
 
  
Big and Small
 
Last night when I got dressed 
I grew bigger with each article of clothing I put on. 
My private face, the sad one no one sees, 
completely disappeared.
  
 
The children’s eyes were bright 
in the golden light of the bookstore.  
The silvery flute and woodsy guitar 
wove around us like red ribbons. 
The children’s eyes were bright, 
their voices golden.  
Their goodness soaked directly into me 
the way clear winter sun benevolently  
seeps into pale December skin.
  
 
When I sleep I become small.  
I coil up tight and sink into dreams  
where I become big again 
walking on real beach sand 
complete with cigarette butts 
and small polished stones.
  
 
I miss the ocean so much 
I conjure it up in dreams, 
the salty air the wide expanse  
the forever of it that spreads  
before me, reflecting a buttery sun.
  
The presence of the children 
calm and patient in the bookstore’s glow 
was like a placid ocean, I could feel 
the possibility of their lives 
an undercurrent of strength 
silent and unseen.
  
 
This morning as grey light  
seeped into my eyes and I uncoiled,   
a galloping cat plunked onto the bed 
her sweet warm breath like sunlight  
against my sleepy cheek.
 
  
Spring Walk
 
A poet and an artist are walking through tall wet grass   
and weeds that crawl around their ankles.
  
 
They point out to each other  
wildflowers poking through bright green blades, 
each stalk straining to be taller than the next. 
  
 
Listing dizzily with the weight of rain 
tiny pink four-petals, straw-like purple clusters 
and shy magenta lanterns bow their heavy heads; 
bright white popcorn flowers, usually so rambunctious 
sway drunkenly in the meadow.  
Only under cover of dripping manzanita 
do swaths of yellow-stars defiantly shine.
  
 
The artist wants to pick them,  
stick them in a vase and paint them, 
keep them alive on her canvas, 
a testimony to how they’ve risen  
from winter’s frozen mud.  
  
 
The poet sees them months from now 
shriveled where they stand 
unidentifiable skeletons, uniformly  
bleached and dry as surfer hair. 
She already feels the profusion of burrs 
the protrusion of hornbill, screw weed,  
prickly little stickers that pierce and cling  
begging to be transported elsewhere 
on dog fur or on her socks.
  
 
So the artist’s heart is light 
while the poet’s heart is heavy.
  
 
The poet must propel her mind  
through scorching summer and brittle fall 
to December’s first compassionate blanket of frost  
that will cool and subdue spring’s wild procreative lust.
  
 
  
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